This question is one I’ve never had asked of me by a man before; though I’ve been asked about something similar and that will be a different blog post. Without further ado, let’s see the question:
I have another question for your blog. I am a little embarrassed, but don’t know where to talk about this. I have been seeing someone off and on for a year and he recently brought up ATM (ass to mouth). I had no clue what that even meant. I’m pretty adventurous when it comes to sex, but this is a bit over the top for me. Should I say hell no or get drunk and let loose? Everything I Googled about it is negative or porn. I know this is explicit, but he eats my ass out ALL the time, but the thought of traces of feces in my mouth sickens me.
Ass to mouth. Does everyone know exactly what that means? If you don’t, it means going from anal sex straight to a blow job without pause to clean off. Everyone on the same page? Hence her concern about getting shit in her mouth. It’s not an irrational concern in the least. There is almost no way for you to not, at best, get Dirty Sanchezed or a full on ingestion of your poop… at worst. There are millions of bacteria in the rectum and even if you wash and use enemas prior, you can’t stop your digestive track from functioning.
Some may claim that there is a way to make it safe and I suppose if you use a condom during anal, remove it and give him head with a fresh condom on or bareback that can minimize the risk but there’s no way to be 100% sure you are clean.
Rim jobs are a horse of a different color. You can make sure your asshole is clean enough for a tongue to do some tickling in that area. Being deeply penetrated by a man’s cock is not the same as a shallow dipping of a tongue.
Here’s my personal opinion on this act. It’s humiliating. I’m not sure how going from anal to a blow job increases sexual pleasure for a man and if I’m wrong, I’d like a man to PLEASE TELL ME. It wasn’t something that happened in the “heat of passion”, it’s something you were asked upfront if you’d be willing to do. If you say yes, you will be allowing someone to degrade and humiliate you during a very intimate act. Now, if you are sexually aroused by being degraded and humiliated (and some are) then I guess you should go for it – just take as many precautions as you can to avoid becoming seriously ill.
Even the definition in the Urban Dictionary for ATM is similar to my opinion:
“One of the newer marketing ploys in pornography is called “ATM” (“ass to mouth”), where the male performer anally penetrates a woman and then sticks his penis into her mouth, often joking about her having to eat shit. In this pornography the code of debasement is most stark. There is no apparent increase in male sexual pleasure by moving directly from the anus to the mouth outside of the humiliation that the woman must endure.”
(Robert Wosnitzer et al, 2006, “Aggression and Sexual Behavior in Best-Selling Pornography: A Content Analysis”, p. 23)Men who enjoy the suffering and humiliation of women (=”ass to mouth”), are diagnosed with paraphilia (“sexual deviancy” in scientific terms) according to the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders by the American Psychiatric Association and the International Statistical Classification of Diseases and Related Health Problems by the World Health Organization.