Tag Archive | oral sex

The Big Girl’s Guide to Orgasms…

bibir-seksiEverybody wants one, not everyone knows how to get/give one. Why is it so complicated? Because despite the fact that we see sex EVERYWHERE, we are still a fairly repressed society. We see sex on magazines, television, billboards but mention it in company and it’s done in hushed whispers. Pssssst, because we still think it’s dirty.

My feeling on this is: sex is dirty… if you’re lucky enough to have a good partner. I love dirty sex. Dirty sex means I’m getting off and getting off good.  If I only cum once…it’s almost disappointing. I’m a real whore when it comes to getting off and you should be too.

We only live once, you know…

I’m going to recap what you need to know about women and orgasms. I covered this in my post on masturbation .

There are 4 types of orgasms a woman can have…yes, FOUR!! And Feminists didn’t do shit to get them for us. 😉

  • Clitoral orgasms – the clitoris has 8000 nerve endings so with the right amount of pressure and effort, you can blow your lid pretty quickly just by stimulating that tiny little button (or in some cases a turkey neck).
  • Vaginal orgasms – some people believe in a G-spot others don’t. To achieve an orgasm this way takes longer, so the longer you are being penetrated and thrust into the more likely you will achieve the Big O. Making sure you are lubed up or wet enough is a must. Tilting your pelvis helps to reach the sweet spot. It’s trial and error but oh so worth it when you get there.
  • Blended orgasms – these occur when you are stimulating both the clit and the vagina. This is the MOST powerful orgasm and when you get one of these, you’ll likely not be able to walk right away from all that leg shaking.
  • Multiple orgasms – these happen one after the other pretty quickly. Not everyone can withstand the constant stimulation but those who can…holy shit!!

So, how do you achieve them? Before you can get your partner to help you cum, you need to be able to cum on your own. So…masturbate. Masturbate a lot. If you don’t know how to do it then read my tips on masturbation here. One of the easiest ways to achieve orgasm is through oral sex but you should be willing to give as well as receive, even if it’s not required. Also, keep a nice pretty pussy. Don’t ask someone to put their face and mouth in an unkempt, smelly jungle. Read my guide to going “Downtown” and enjoy what happens next.

Should You Fake It?

Don’t get in the habit of faking orgasms. What’s the point? Your partner wants to make you cum, if you fake it – you’ve cheated them and yourself. I get not wanting to hurt someone’s feelings. I don’t want to hurt anyone either, so I try hard to not be a cunt. (I sometimes fail…LOL) If you fake it too much, you guarantee one thing…shitty sex.

Sometimes you simply have to say, “Baby, I love you but I think you’re gonna need to eat my pussy before you fuck me”.  It will make orgasms via penetration much easier, if you’ve already cum once or are on the verge of it.

If you can’t say that, then say instead: “Let’s 69!!!” That’s sexy and it’s only 2 words!!!

Don’t fear losing control and don’t spend too much time thinking about your orgasm. Be in the moment. The minute you start worrying that you may not cum, you won’t. Turn your brain off, and let your body turn on.

The point I’m trying to make here is this…we have many different ways to achieve The Big O, you need to find out what works for you, then relax and enjoy the ride.

One last thing…NO ASS TO MOUTH. That’s just a no. No ASS to anything. You love anal, great!!! Do it last and hit the showers.

 

Have a great weekend!!!

 

 

The Big Girl’s Guide To Foreplay

Everyone knows or believe they know what foreplay is and everyone has an opinion on the purpose of it, the best way to go about it or whether it’s even necessary. Opinions are like assholes, everyone has one, so here’s mine: when it comes to sex there is no “one size fits all” and people who think they know how to please ALL women because they managed to make a few girls cum will eventually get knocked off the top Mt. Arrogance and the fall will leave a nasty mark.

Here are a few things you should know:

  • No two pussies are alike, they vary in size, shape, look and what arouses them
  • As a woman ages, what worked in the past, may not work now
  • A large part of arousal occurs in the brain not just her snatch
  • Arousal and orgasm can be affected by factors other than what’s happening in the bedroom. Stress or distress can make it really difficult to get off

Taking all of those things into consideration, you will start to understand the importance of good foreplay. If you are just looking to hump and dump, then what I have to say won’t matter to you; but if you get as much pleasure from giving pleasure as you do receiving it…then this blog is for YOU.

Have you ever heard a woman say that she can’t cum unless (fill in the blank)? The blank is usually some variant of clitoral stimulation be it oral, vibration or fingering. There is a reason for that. The clitoris is the female equivalent of a penis and we need it to be erect to cum. A woman requires two things to achieve pleasure: a well lubricated vagina and an erect clit. A damp pussy isn’t always going to be enough, so if you stop foreplay the minute you feel some wetness, it will take longer for a woman to orgasm – if at all. Even the Man of Steel may not be able to stay hard long enough to pull off that miracle.

This is why foreplay is so important. It increases the likelihood that your woman will be howling at the moon, which is what you want, unless you’re a selfish prick. 😉

The best thing to do is to either make your woman cum during foreplay by either eating her pussy like a starving dog eats Puppy Chow or working her clit with your fingers or a toy until she cums. Make sure she’s a little wet when you start on her clit because diddling a dry clit can seriously fucking hurt.

You don’t have to make her cum during foreplay to get an orgasm during penetration but it’s sure easier that way. There are many different things you can do to get her aroused, if you aren’t sure what to do you can certainly ask her what she likes. You can try doing multiple things that arouse all her senses until she’s ready to burst or she’s begging you to slam your hard cock inside her. Work the erogenous zones, talk dirty to her, use toys, role play or watch some porn – if she’s into that.

The most important thing to remember is DO NOT RUSH. The longer you work the foreplay, the higher her chances are for an orgasm or multiple orgasms.

Good luck and happy fucking!!

 

Blow Jobs! The Big Girl’s Guide To Oral Sex (part 2)

Here we are…and you’re wondering is this post for men or is it for women? Both, really. I’m going to cover briefly what men should do if they want their woman to give them head. Then I’ll talk about how to give a good one and that part is for the Big Girls.

Men:

You like a good blow job (lots of sucking, ball play and other tricks), heck, let’s be honest you’d like a mediocre one (lick, lick, jerk, jerk…no balls, uh uh) if you can get it, am I right? 😉 So, you want your woman to put your penis in her mouth but she won’t or won’t do it often. Why not? There could be a few reasons and I’m going to tell you what they are, so you can change the frequency of oral sex in your life.

Scent:

Women love a man that smells good. I’m not talking cologne or after shave but those are nice. I’m talking clean. We like a clean, fresh and sexy smell. You’ve been gone all day, showered early and you still smell nice and so you think, “I want some head” . What hasn’t crossed your mind at all is that an entire days worth of sweating and pissing…may have taken a toll on the scent of your dick. It has. There is no way around it, it has. Your balls are now on the musty side and your penis tastes like a salty dog after all that urinating. Some women, a small minority of women, are okay with that.  Some girls will put anything in their mouth and if you have such a gem, congratulations! (See your doctor regularly, though) The rest of us will find a pair of musty balls gag inducing and there is simply NOTHING sexy about a woman gagging or retching on a man’s penis. You want a nice BJ? Shower before if time permits or use a baby wipe/soapy washcloth to freshen the area – AFTER you piss. Then she will happily gobble you up endlessly until you finish.

Hair:

MANSCAPING!!!!!!!!! Please, pretty please trim up your genital area. You don’t have to shave yourself bare but clean it up a bit. It reduces the sweat issue, lowers the musty factor and keeps us from gagging on long pubes that get stuck in the back of our throats.  We’re not asking for the moon but we are asking for a bit of consideration. You won’t be sorry.

Ladies:

Do not be intimidated when it comes to giving your man head, even if he’s packing walking stick. You want to be able to give a man pleasure of the oral variety for many reasons and not the least of which is…he really wants you to do it.  It’s sexy as hell and it can really increase the sexual stimulation for you. It’s actually a very pleasant experience if he follows the above directives on personal grooming and hygiene.

Hands:

We’ve all heard the “lick it like an ice cream cone” bit. It’s true, that works and if you do that, he’ll like it and it may be enough to make him cum. But you can add elements to make it better than okay, which is all that will be if you just lick it like an ice cream.  Use your hands as an extension of your mouth and throat, you’ll want a nice tight grip on the base of his shaft. Then wrap your mouth just a bit below the place where the head of the penis connects to the shaft so your lips meet your fist, and move your mouth and hand in a rhythmic motion. Take it inch by inch and don’t try to shove it all down your throat unless you know you can.

Head:

Pay a lot of attention to the head region. Kiss it, suck it, lick it and rub it across your mouth. Keep your eyes locked on him as you do it. It’s an added turn on for him to watch and hotter if he sees the excitement in your eyes as you adore his cock with your lips.

Balls:

Don’t ignore these babies. Use a hand to caress them as you are working his shaft. Lick and kiss your way down and lick and suck them gently into your mouth.  Also, that little area between his balls and anus…lick and probe there too. 😉

Extras:

Try humming while he’s in your mouth to create a vibration, he’ll enjoy that. Also, suck some ice or use flavored sex gel, whipped cream, honey or something like that, slather it on and lick him clean. Don’t use anything acidic or spicy, that will not be sexy – it will hurt and kill the mood. I just read about using a grapefruit…my husband hasn’t consented to that one yet, so I can’t say for sure if it’s a good one to try but you can read about it here.

To Swallow or Not:

Personal preference. If you don’t think you can, ask him to tap you out. If you can then do, it makes a man feel complete when he cums in your mouth. Of course, he may not give you a choice because he may cum quickly or want to finish by banging you – that’s great too.  Don’t ruin the moment, just go with the flow…literally. 😉

The most important thing I have to say about giving a great blow job is this:

WATCH YOUR TEETH!!!  Don’t use them unless he asks and if he does…GENTLY!!!

 

That’s it for today!

As always, if you have a topic or a suggestion/question you’d like me to address, email me: rosie.ribner@gmail.com

Going “Downtown”! The Big Girl’s Guide To Oral Sex

Yes…Oh God, yes!!!! Who does not like oral sex? If you are reading this and thinking “I don’t”, my question would be why the heck not? Seriously, Big Girls, having your partner spend some quality time in your lady bits with his tongue and fingers can be heaven, if they know what they’re doing. You need to allow yourself to enjoy it and that isn’t always easy, especially for a Big Girl. On the other hand, maybe they don’t know what they’re about down there…what then? That’s what I’m covering today… two topics in the area of going downtown. How to both enjoy oral and what to do if they don’t know how to get you off.

How can I sit back or lay back and enjoy a trip downtown?

When you can’t relax and enjoy sex be it oral or otherwise, it’s usually because of some hang ups. What hang ups can a Big Girl have when it comes to oral?

Being on display:

Spread out and naked can make a Big Girl with some confidence issues really uncomfortable. Two things to keep in mind when a man wants to do this is that HE WANTS TO DO THIS TO YOU. That means: you turn him on and more specifically YOUR BODY TURNS HIM ON. He wants to look, he wants to taste and he wants to please you.  Say that to yourself a few times and get used to the idea. Men are very visual and if a man has chosen a Big Girl, it’s because he is attracted to her body. Let him look, touch and taste it. There is no better feeling in the world than having your partner show you how sexy you are to them. Let him!

Smell:

Every human on the planet has a unique scent and that includes your lady bits. It’s a natural pheromone and unless there is something wrong or you haven’t bathed, it’s a good thing.  If your man wants to go downtown and you are not just stepping out of a shower, then take a moment to freshen up a bit. Sweat and bodily functions can give your natural scent an unwanted kick, you do not want your lover to get a nose full of that. Grab some baby wipes or female fresh wipes and give yourself a quick swipe. If you have an infection or you smell fishy…no go. Take care of your health, keep that vag squeaky clean and it’s a go.

You just can’t cum that way:

Unless there is something really wrong and I mean structurally non-functional and you just don’t ever orgasm, even when masturbating… you can cum that way.  If you have never done so, there are likely two causes. The first being something I mentioned above was in your head and you couldn’t relax and simply enjoy the act. You should have nothing in your head besides the moment and what you are feeling. Negative thoughts will freeze you and prevent you from enjoying sex, in general. The other is my next topic, so keep reading. 😉

What can I do if he doesn’t know how to eat my pussy?

Teach him. You’ve got all your demons under control and you want him to give you oral. He does and nothing, nada, nyet. He can’t seem to find your clit any better than Mr. Magoo in the dark. Now what? You don’t want to hurt his feelings, so you say nothing and maybe even give him a sympathy moan.

DON’T DO THAT!

The whole reason his face is down there lapping up your snatch is because he wants to please you, make you cum and get you ready for his entry. Or he wants you to reciprocate. Either way you are doing both yourself and him a disservice by not helping him out. You can do it two ways, first you can verbally call out directions. That can be hot, dirty talk and really enhance the experience as well as helping him, help you, cum like a geyser. Example: Lower baby, higher, yes, there, don’t stop, harder, put two fingers inside me, faster, etc. You get the picture.  The other way is to move your ass where you need it to be. Literally grind yourself on his face. Is he just a pinch too low, tilt your pelvis so your clit hits his tongue and then grab his head and hold him there.  Gently use your thighs and knees to keep him in place and then move your pelvis up or down as needed. You’ll be moaning for real in no time flat and he will get harder than Stonehenge by your responses to his efforts.

So, that’s it for now. Next I’ll tell you how to suck the chrome off his hood like a pro. I mean, sex is a two way street and if you want him to pleasure your bits with oral, you should always try and return the favor. 😉

 

 

Update:

What do you do if he doesn’t want to go there? Ask him why. It is either because he’s not sure what to do or your pussy looks like a jungle. If he won’t give you a direct answer, it’s likely that the unkempt nature of your nether region is putting him off. Rare since most of us trim the trim but if you are going natural, you may want to invest in a bikini wax or a good razor and landscape that area. It’s not sexy to gag on hair, don’t waste an opportunity by not keeping things tidy. 😉